Blue Star

Rocky Road
By: 
Scott Sullivan
“Millions,” reports the Washington Post, “have been spent on ‘wildlife protection’—protection, that is, from wildlife—but squirrels routinely outsmart plastic animal guards on energized equipment, gnaw through rubbery insulation and squirm into power substations, zapping electricity to thousands of homes and businesses while meeting untimely deaths.” “Hokey smoke” as Rocky the Flying Squirrel, Bullwinkle’s friend in cartoons, would say. Who hasn’t cursed computers, Consumers Energy or power grid terrorists for such outages when Rocky’s kin were to blame?

“We have met the enemy and he is us,” said the cartoon character Pogo. Not so, say conspiracy theorists.

“They”—big government, liberals, conservatives, take your pick—are what really ail us. “It’s their fault people aren’t self-responsible,” these folks say.

I would be remiss not to have my own theories. Start with squirrels.

For full story, pick up a copy of the Jan. 28 Commercial Record or subscribe to the e-edition.

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