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Happy You Nears
Scott Sullivan
I was conducting a risk/reward study of inviting swimsuit models to join me at the Detroit Forklift Festival vs. my wife finding out when I read a newspaper spread on December holidays celebrated by Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus and Buddhists. I loved the ecumenical intent. But what about Shintoists, Taoists, Bokononists and so on? Who makes the cut? Was this a trail of tiers, like the GOP debates?

Every year I resolve not to make resolutions, then I break it. Not in 2016. There is too much I’ve been neglecting.

Start with “Forklift safety rules you can’t ignore,” the email said. Talk about an imperative. No more ignorance is bliss. Time to face the music.

For just $299 I can buy a Forklift Training Safety Essentials kit so I won’t join the close to 100 workers injured daily in forklift accidents or the one who’s killed every four days.

I’m not a forklift kind of guy. Still, it’s a miracle I have escaped these fates. Who knows when the urge might strike to hoist pallets onto a flatbed? Or unload dryers from a semi?

For full story, pick up a copy of the Dec. 31 Commercial Record or subscribe to the e-edition.

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